Domestic violence is a complex social problem. One in every four women faces this problem during her lifetime. It is a very common issue and may happen to anyone. But unfortunately, society usually ignores its prevalence. Most of the times, it is overlooked because of the following reasons.
People belonging to the literate class, sometimes, oversee this problem thinking that domestic violence is not their community’s problem. But the reality is entirely different. It has been observed in a latest survey that in Michigan on average one woman is killed by her partner or ex partner every week. In spite the literacy rate in Michigan is 85% yet this crime is very common. Moreover, people usually claim that only poor women become victims of domestic violence but it is not so. Different studies have shown that it can happen in all kinds of families and relationships.For example in UK, one in every four women faces domestic violence.The statistics of Pakistan are not very different.No matter what the reasons are,women belonging to every culture,religion and race have been seen facing this problem.It might be their husbands who oppress them or their fathers or brothers.
It is usually heard in our culture that she provoked his anger. She should listen to him anyway. It is very important to realize that the only person responsible for the abuse is the abuser himself.
Moreover, alcohol or use of other drugs is responsible for a person’s violent behavior towards spouse or children. But it is not the case. Violence may go along with alcohol or use of other drugs but these things do not make somebody violent.Drinking alcohol or  using drugs is not justified but these things should not be considered the cause of somebody’s violent behaviour.
Domestic violence is a personal matter of husband and wife. Why should we interfere? People usually pay no attention to a victim by saying this. The closed ones should intervene if they see their sisters or daughters going through a violent relationship.
At the same time it is extremely essential to know that whether a relationship is actually abusive or not. Differentiating between healthy argument and abuse is very crucial for a better life. Having arguments is natural in a relationship. People may disagree with their partners, family members and others close to them at times. But it is not normal if it gets consistent and becomes an everyday matter. The foundation of every relationship should lay on love not fear. Knowing and acknowledging abuse is the first step to end it.
Here are a few signs of an abusive relationship:
1. You are afraid of your partner. He is very short tempered and surprises with his mood swings. 2. You spend more time working out what kind of mood he is in and always focus on his needs.
3. He hits you and your children.
4. He criticizes your family and friends and makes it difficult for you to meet them or talk to them.
5. He calls you names and threatens you and your children.
6. He is jealous and accuses you of flirting and having affairs.
7. He regularly criticizes or undermines you in front of other people.
8. Your needs are not important for him, and he makes the decisions in the relationship.
9. You find it hard to get time for yourself. When you do spend time away from him, he demands   to know where you were and who you were with.
10. He controls your access to basic essentials such as the car, the family finances, telephone and internet.
11. He forces you to do something that you really do not want to do.
12. He tries to control aspects of your life such as whether you work, and where; who you see and when; what you can spend; what you can wear; what you can watch on TV or listen to on the radio.
One should be very careful while understanding a relationship. Before taking any big decision, one should discuss the problems with somebody trustworthy. A little mistake may  make you lose a good partner or may  put you in a great trouble.